PISSED AT STARBUCKS

There ought to be a law against people who go to a Starbucks bathroom, flush the toilet, turn on the hand blower, and then do not immediately open the door and leave. 

It’s so rude to professional Starbucks pissers who are anxiously listening to the hand dryer thinking the person inside will come right out.    

 Veteran Starbucks pee ers think that they will quickly be able to relieve themselves when the blower goes silent. Its terribly uncomfortable to get faked out.

 Just the other day I stopped at my favorite Starbucks which is on my delivery route. I had a fierce urge to take a piss. My old bladder was bursting. I walked in and looked at the single bathroom door and I saw there was no one waiting to go in. 

 Relief. I felt happy for a second. Then, I turned the handle of the door and the door was locked. “Shit,” I mumbled quietly. I started swaying nervously waiting to hear the toilet flush. It did quickly. Then the hand blower started blasting away.Ah. Thank goodness. Relief was only a few seconds away. I then heard the blower turn off and I already had my hand on my zipper in anticipation of emptying my bloated bladder.

But, the door did not open. Another few moments went by and I was sweating and swaying  and getting crazy. I was just about to let loose in my pants. After all, I’m sixty nine years old. My bladder is no longer made of steel. Now, it seems to be made of tissue paper. Another moment passed and I couldn’t take it. I snapped. I pounded hard on the door with both fists. Nothing happened. Then, I started kicking the door while still pounding away with my hands.

Still, nothing doing.