DAVID'S PLACE:

There ought to be a law against people who use a Starbucks bathroom, flush the toilet, turn on the hand blower, and then do not immediately open the door and leave. It’s so tormenting for Starbucks bathroom users who stand outside the bathroom door listening for the flush and hand drier to sound thinking they will be able to get in and relieve themselves. Just the other day I stopped at a favorite Starbucks which is in the center of Chicago. I had a fierce urge to urinate. My seventy three year old bladder was bursting from driving my Uber for too long a stretch. I entered and looked at the single bathroom door and there was no one waiting to go in. Relief. I felt happy but only for a few seconds. Then, I turned the handle of the door and it was locked. “Crap,” I mumbled quietly. I started swaying nervously waiting to hear the toilet flush. It did. Than, the hand blower started blowing. Those are the sure signs that the pers...

There ought to be a law against people who go to a Starbucks bathroom, flush the toilet, turn on the hand blower, and then do not immediately open the door and leave.  It's so rude to professional Starbucks pissers who are listening to the hand dryer thinking they will be able to relieve themselves when the blower goes silent.  Just the other day I stopped at my favorite Starbucks which is on my delivery route. I had a fierce urge to take a piss. My old bladder was bursting.  I entered and looked at the single bathroom door and there was no one waiting to go in. Relief, I felt happy for a second. Then, I turned the handle of the door and it was locked. "Shit," I mumbled quietly.  I started swaying nervously waiting to hear the toilet flush. It did quickly, Then the hand blower started blasting away.  Ah. Thank goodness. Relief was a few seconds away. I then heard the blower turn off and I already had my hand on my zipper in anticipation of emptying my b...

I had this girlfriend who was prominent and gave a lot of speeches. She got free hotels many times. One time she got this suite in a Chicago hotel. She gave me the key and told me to just lay around, order room service and have fun until she was done speaking. Then she would meet me up there for the sex with each other we were living for at the time. I roamed around this gigantic double suite penthouse. I walked through some doors and was very impressed with the amenities. Suddenly. I had the urge to have a bowel movement. I opened the closest bathroom door and sat down for what I thought would be a very relaxing experience. Suddenly, I heard the outside door open to the room I was in. I heard people’s voices. I had thought I was in our main suite but I had wandered into an adjoining suite without knowing it. I was sitting on the toilet and too far away from the door to the bathroom to get up and close it. A second later a man and a woman were standing in front of the open bat...