Monday, February 1, 2021

OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE DISORDER OCD 72 YEAR OLD TELLS HIS STORY AND OFFERS TIPS

 It's computer dummy heaven today. I just figured out how to fix my laptop all alone. It only required batteries but normally I would not have been able to even find where the batteries go. My new OCD mindfulness gave me a bonus. I am a 72 year old geezer but giddy as if I had just stole my first high school kiss.

A fortunate life has been my blessing. But, as my mother used to say "your worst enemy cannot do to you what you can do to yourself." What a merciless self assaulter I have been. We are talking mentally, The pain from a broken brain is ferocious.

I remember trying to lay my dead tired eight year old body in bed and go to sleep but I couldn't. The pillow would not line up to my satisfaction with a thin line on the headboard. So, I would keep popping up out of bed like a jumping jack for hours on end trying to line up the pillow exactly the way I wanted it. I would finally just flop into the bed drenched in sweat and pass out because my little body was so exhausted.

The obsessions became worse as I got older. Physical confrontation became the centerpiece of my Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. The word FEAR is central to my defective soul. I believe it is to everyone with OCD.

Facing dangerous self made physical confrontations was my curse. I would be mentally implored to go back after someone who I decided had bullied me with words or deeds. It could have been a high school schoolmate who slapped me around thirty years before or a person who insulted a lady at the golf course in the morning who I thought I should have stood up to.

I could grab onto any event and conclude I had to be my own avenging angel. All that had to happen was a thought popping into my head. Bingo. The thought would not go away. Than, off I would go to the OCD dungeon.

My stomach would start rolling constantly. Only, after finding the misguided courage to act by confronting the bully would the fear abate. Most times, my attempts exacerbated the problem and turned minor, non-dangerous obsessions into deadly missions.

My delusional trips to hell lasted from days to decades and sometimes with multiple obsessions working simultaneously. Than, after even a favorable conclusion, the fear would come back about the same issue or a new issue. The insidiousness of OCD always returns and continues with a sufferer.

There is no finish line.

I do not know how I led a somewhat normal life married with a wife and kids for many years. I escaped through gambling, sex, cocaine, and anything but taking my emotional problems seriously. I even started and developed several businesses which I mostly pissed away because of OCD and other mental disorders.

Symbolically, trying to line up that pillow defined my life. Endlessly seeking relief for my tortured mind by seeking relief and confronting people I thought bullied me for any reason was my existence.

I could be triggered from loud music, barking dogs, a person insulting or making fun of or criticizing me. Hearing sarcastic remarks aimed at me was intolerable and grounds for retribution. Slammed doors and countless other triggers would bring out the same insanity that trying to adjust that pillow triggered.

I just had to get it right. That meant finding and than confronting the victimizer with my terror stricken mind which was petrified of the consequences but unable to stop the pursuit.

The torture was merciless and went on 24/7 when I would get something in my head that I did not want to do but felt I had to do or my stomach would torment with that horrid flight or fight feeling.

The pain lasted acutely for 69 years and still exists, but mildly in comparison when I was so bad I could not get out of bed for days.

Finally, I surrendered and accepted that 100% self acceptance was only right answer for me. I came to terms with me.

That has proven to be very painful but amazingly effective.

It amounts to doing nothing with that OCD urge but living with it.

Not acting is the answer for everyone. Not giving into checking the door or washing your hands again or thousands of other urges builds strength.

The temptation with OCD is always to give into urges for fast but only temporary relief.

The road to health is accepting OCD and knowing the condition will get better and very manageable as you work on it.

Starving it is the pathway to relief.

It is what you should do about that urge that has owned you.

Nothing.

I always felt like a victim who was compelled to confront every OCD urge.

I fearfully got into countless confrontations because of the misguided belief that I would get permanent relief after I resolved some ridiculous issue. I would usually end up worse off then I was before I started trying to solve the thing that triggered me.

I ended up in front of judges, in jail, and in a mental hospital because of the degrees to which I would go seeking relief.

I went to so many shrinks, took so many pills, read so many books, and still occasionally suffer as I write about OCD sixty five years after it started.

It has no quit. But, it cannot breathe if I do not give it oxygen.

I blessedly have found pathways to relief through exercising, writing, meditating, breathing, and just knowing the OCD urge is just a thinking disorder and can be accepted and coped with. That sounds easy but it's not.

It takes mind bending work to heal. There is hope for all of us though. Take it from me..

I am not violent or psychotic. I am a lifelong scared little boy who was taught to go outside and face the bullies in the old neighborhood. I cried instead. The family definition of courage was about fists and not words. It took a lifetime to recognize the family was fucked up with good intentions. They did not know macho was not a one size fits all hat.

After many years of good fortune even though I have taken many poundings from acting out I have landed right side up.

But, not until I was arrested and briefly jailed several times for minor non-violent crimes, been in a mental ward, and been isolated from the world in severe depression many times.. Everything was connected to OCD.

Endless hours of OCD torture have left me damaged mentally but okay enough to say I am much better after a lot of hard work.

I now am spending time learning how to let stuff go and accept my condition. I never really cared about standing up for myself except for a few times in my life where it was legitimate. It's selfishly only been about relieving the fear that I felt with and never sticking with the coping skills that I would not use properly.

Writing is an alternative for me. Right now I am choosing not to obsess or act out and I accept my condition. It ain't going away.

Exercising, reading, volunteering, hobbies, and almost any activity are tools that work well in battling OCD.

Going to OCD group meetings and becoming friendly with others who are afflicted is valuable and a big step in recovering.

The irrational but overwhelming fear of the "what ifs" of not doing what you falsely believe you must do literally eats you up. However, once you are able to realize that the anxiety of OCD urges can be endured with treatment and training life gets immeasurably better.

Learning to say no to debilitating OCD urges is the only way to get permanently healthier.

Obsessive Disorder Compulsive is permanent but can be effectively dealt with as with addictions like gambling or drinking and many others.

You can do it.

12 step programs are effective.

Why me becomes an obvious question to those afflicted reading this.

The answer is your brain is not normal.

Normal brains do not involuntarily attach to abnormal thinking. OCD brains do. They are different chemically and they do not process thoughts correctly.

OCD is always about fear, fear, fear, whether you are compulsively checking and rechecking the stove, door, the dogs water, washing your hands, obsessing about harming a child, facing a bully or some other thought.

But, there are ways to safelytreat OCD..

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is all about fear no matter where you start.

Fear can be dealt with effectively.

Go online and look at resources and blogs on OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) There is so much information out there for every sufferer.

Read about it. Find relief. It is there.

Here are some resources to use. I do not get paid in any way by anyone I mention.

I want to help.

I just Google like you should do.

Here are a few places around the country that came up.

FHEHealth Restore 888-986-1382

Park Avenue Psychotherapy Associates 973-815-0777

Go To UTube and punch up OCD

Call 720-605-1316

Call 305-856-9442

Call 754-227-6634

Online Therapy-312-955-1212

Good Luck

David S.

I am an Obsessive Compulsive Disorder sufferer.

DAVID

Friday, December 18, 2020

RON JOHNSON-WISCONSIN SENATOR-TRUMP ASS KISSING PIECE OF CRAP

Ronald Harold Johnson (born April 8, 1955) is an American businessman and politician serving as the senior United States Senator for Wisconsin. He is a member of the Republican Party. Johnson was first elected to the Senate in 2010, defeating Democratic incumbent Russ Feingold and re-elected in 2016, again defeating Feingold. Before politics, Johnson was chief executive officer of a polyester and plastics manufacturer founded by his brother-in-law.[2

The 2022 United States Senate election in Wisconsin will be held on November 8, 2022, to elect a member of the United States Senate to represent the State of Wisconsin. Incumbent two-term Republican Senator Ron Johnson is eligible to seek a third term, but he has announced that he would retire.

This guy is sticking with Donald J. Trump all the way into hell. Johnson is one of the biggest pieces of crap in the Senate. He only knows that he cannot get his lips unstuck from Trumps ass. 

He cares only about his idol Trump. He cares nothing for upholding the constitutions, being a patriot, being against the Russians, enabling Americans to get stimulus checks, or assisting our country in any other endeavor except helping Trump to continue in his lost cause to overturn the 2020 Presidential election in which Joe Biden was elected.

The guy is worth about 10 million so he is in good shape because of a plastics business he made lots of money in. In 1979, Johnson moved to Wisconsin with his wife, Jane. They both started working with Jane's brother, Pat Curler, at his custom sheet extruder company. The company was named PACUR; the name is an abbreviation of “Pat Curler”. Curler created the company with funding from his and Jane's father, Howard Curler. 6]

Remember this piece of crap human being Ron Johnson. He has been against every good cause others have been in favor of. He is pro gun, anti-abortion, anti human rights, anti immigration.

He is what is changing America from a Democracy to a banana republic.

Tuesday, December 1, 2020

RESIGN PRESIDENT TRUMP AND MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN

Enough is enough Mr. President. Resign immediately. You got the job because you are a great con man. So effective that you still have millions of supporters hypnotized by your bullshit. You keep insisting despite indisputable evidence that you won the 2020 Presidential election. 

The facts do not matter to your rabid followers. They are now a cult of believers that have not yet abandoned you. Too bad. You abandoned them and the rest of the country of Americans you vowed to defend and protect.

Many of us know you are a coward who is shitting in your pants because your term will end in about 50 days. Then, you are just another ordinary citizen in big trouble financially and criminally. 

You are making a herculean effort to fleece your disciples for all the money you can raise. You will use their cash personally for the huge legal and other bills you are on the hook for. 

You will try to pardon yourself for all the federal crimes you have committed while serving your pathetic term as President. 

But, you cannot pardon yourself in New York State where Attorney General Cyrus Vance and other prosecutors have you by the balls. You will be lucky if you do not end up in jail along with some of your family.

 It is certain you will have to pay large amounts of money to many attorneys for many years. That money will have to come from your own pocket after January 20, 2021. You know you are fucked. 

And now you have turned on your own party of cowardly Republicans who have been humoring you in your insistence that you really did not lose the election. That is because they are gutless and terrified you will destroy them by tweeting attacks. 

You are a spoiled, stupid, deranged imbecile who thinks you can keep getting away with lawlessness because you have been allowed to so far. Well, buddy boy, every train eventually stops. Yours is coming to a screeching halt. 

If you do not deliver the vote in the runoff in Georgia for the two open Senate seats you will become a bigger pile of garbage than you already are. You will be ostracized. Many of your ass-kissing Senators will lose their power and their jobs. Think they will keep their lips attached to your butt then? 

Before it's over, you will probably humiliate and debase your own party by threatening to withhold your support for the sleazy Republican Senate candidates if you do not keep getting free assistance. 

Interestingly, no one knows whether you are going to help or hurt the ticket in Georgia if you do try to support the candidates. The odds are you will start talking about your sickening self and repeat your ridiculous lies, and not even try  to promote the shitty candidates your party needs to win to keep the Senate Republican majority.  

Trump, I hope you end up with no supporters, no friends, no money, and you call a prison cell your home. You tried to destroy this country and I'm sure you will continue trying until they throw your ass out of the White House on January 20, 2021. 

You gave up on this country in its biggest time of need by going to the golf course in the midst of a pandemic, a looming recession, and a terribly divided country for which you are to blame.

Resign today LOSER. Make America great again.

Tuesday, November 17, 2020

ANY SCHMUCK CAN BE A BEST SELLING WRITER

I can write a book. I think everyone has a good book somewhere in them.

I do not think it matters what the subject is. I think it is all about how interesting the story is based on how good a storyteller the author is. 

That is why one can look at the books stacking the shelves of bookstores and immediately realize that getting published is a combination of luck and timing. A few authors dominate the book space. 

Success is all about the voice of the writer. 

Can you keep people captivated with your experiences or knowledge? If so, write about stories are. 

Who knows?

By voice I mean the way the words are put together. Like a golfer every writer must make contact at the end of the swing. Attracting interest is the key to writing. It is the contact. 

I feel that pure talent has very little to do with writing success in terms of technique. Tons of writers with all kinds of degrees in journalism cannot make a nickel with the words they put out. 

Then, some schmuck tells a good story and gets famous.

I have written all kinds of fiction, and non-fiction stories on every imaginable topic which goes nowhere. I put my stuff out here, on some other sites, and send my stories to my friends and followers. I make very few nickels from what I write.

I admit I do not have formal writing training and I don't dedicate myself to continual writing. Fuck it. I am glad I do not have to make a living writing to survive.

It took me years to make $100.00 from Google Adsense which admittedly is a weak but FREE beginners platform.

I have written a lot of interesting things and I would love to get discovered. But, I am a 72 year old guy who has mostly surrendered to the fact that I am just another wanna be writer.

So, my blog is kingdavidsplace.blogspot.com

Come and visit me.

David

Sunday, November 1, 2020

TOP EARNING BLOGS AND BLOGGERS

MOST POPULAR TYPES OF BLOGS

  1. Fashion Blogs 
  2. Food Blog
  3. Travel Blogs 
  4. Music Blogs
  5. Lifestyle Blogs
  6. Fitness Blogs
  7. DIY Blogs
  8. Sports Blogs
TOP HIGHEST EARNING BLOGS
  • Moz: $44.9 million per year.
  • PerezHilton: $41.3 million per year.
  • Copyblogger: $33.1 million per year.
  • Mashable: $30 million per year.
  • TechCrunch: $22.5 million per year.
  • Envato Tuts+: $10 million per year.
  • Smashing Magazine: $5.2 million per year.
  • Gizmodo: $4.8 million per year.

TOP BUSINESS BLOGGERS
  1. Noah Kagan. Noah Kagan of okdork.com is the founder of two multi-million businesses.
  2. Darren Rowse
  3. Pat Flynn
  4. Neil Patel
  5. Seth Godin
  6. Matt Marshall
  7. Rand Fishkin
  8. Matt Cut

All of these blogs were started by a person with an idea. 

Starting a blog is free, easy, and fun. 
If blogging interests you than try it.
Go to #Blogger on #Google.
You can be up and running in 15 minutes with almost no computer skills. FREE

If I can do it anybody can. I am a 72 year old man who does not know much about anything. 
All you need is a computer and a tiny bit of writing ability. 

You make money by how many people click on your blog.

Your subject can be anything in this world. Anything. 

You may have information to offer that thousands of people are looking for. 

Google does all the bookeeping in their Adsense Dept.

Don't forget, there are literally millions of people online around the world looking for something. 
Maybe you have it?

Good luck.


Attribution. Copied material.