DAVID'S PLACE:

 I saw this beautiful black haired woman on an online dating site. She was about 45, tall, and classy looking. Her profile said she lived in a fancy suburb outside Chicago, and that she was divorced and had no kids living at home. Perfect person for me, an inveterate professional online dating love junkie 55 years old, good looking, smooth talking and a great hustler of women.   I sent her an email on match.com which is the online site. She saw my profile and which showed my pictures, age, religion, income, likes and dislikes. All the stuff that is supposed to matter. It may to some. Pictures and not having kids living at home and a convenient location are the only things that matter to me. She sent her phone number and we chatted briefly and then she told me that she was go...

I have OCD short for obsessive compulsive disorder. If you don't know about it or don't have it then Google it. I have the kind of OCD where thinking over and over about performing some act that I think requires physical courage consumes my life. Today, I just woke up after sleeping 14 hours. For what? Because I do not want to give in to an obsession to call someone and report an unimportant act of rudeness to an old lady I witnessed. I'm hiding from myself. This van driver was in the driveway of my high rise building. This older lady, who I do not know, was blocked in the parking lot entrance. He thought she had enough room to move around him. He would not move and she kept yelling at him. The frustrated lady jumped out of her car and started yelling at the dope He moved but as he moved he screamed "bitch" at her.  I was also going to get out of my car and confront the guy when the lady confronted him. I don't know why I did not. Maybe because it happen...

Progress. This blog is starting to get read.  Search engines are finding me and page views are increasing   Thank you..

I was working at a pizza place in Chicago a while back. There were many drivers working there and they represented a wide variety of individuals.  The ages ranged from 21 to 65 and I was one of the older ones who were generally not the objects of attention. However, being old did not give me any exemption from the OCD demons that have plagued me.  I overheard a remark this guy made about Jewish people. I confronted him immediately.and he did not want to apologize and I would not let it go. I quit working there. I eventually came back there to confront him again. I ended up swinging at him. He threw me to the ground telling me to stop swinging or he would hurt me. I left but still could not get closure. It ended a few months later with me begging him for forgiveness after I finally gathered the courage to go back there again to apologize. It was not about the Jewish remark anymore. It never had been. It was about how living with the remark had made me into an anxiety ridden...

Meyer Harris "Mickey" Cohen was a short, violent Jewish gangster  in Los Angeles in the forties and fifties. He is portrayed by Sean Penn in the film Gangster Squad. Cohen was born Sept. 4,1913 in Brooklyn and died July 29, 1976. He was an intimidating ex prize fighter who was totally ruthless. But, he had that candid, crazy personality that attracted a huge following of people.  He hung out with Frank Sinatra and Lana Turner and employed Johnny Stompanato, Lana's boy toy, as a bodyguard. Not a very good one either. Lana's daughter stabbed him to death so the story goes.Sean Connery (James Bond) once knocked out Stompanato who was having a fit of jealousy. Check this out at Biography.com. Love these real life mob guys.

I'm dying to gamble. It could be going to the casino and playing poker, slots, craps. It could be playing poker online. It could be betting on basketball, hockey, or anything at all. I will gamble on flipping coins for thousands of dollars.  I am a sick, degenerate compulsive gambler. Yet, I sit in my penthouse apartment writing, watching TV, talking on the phone and doing anything but gambling. Why don't I? considering the horrible urge I feel to  just do it. No. No. No.  I have not made a bet since January 9, 2009.  I don't intend to. Today. That is why I now have some money now, can sleep, can afford to support myself, have no bills that are late, no bookmakers chasing me, no credit card companies or banks hunting me down.and all the other problems that come with being a compulsive gambler. So, my painful effort to not give into my urge is part of the price that must be paid in return for the freedom of not being broke and miserable. I have to tell myself th...