David on a continual mission to prove his manhood to himself so he can feel ok inside. Physical fighting is still the cornerstone. This night david and deb are out with another couple to dinner. It is while they ar engaged
Table of people out to dinner near davids table.They are drunk, loud and profane.
Guy-So, the fucken guy comes up to me
D-Losing appetite due to intimidation. Feels he will have to confront this guy
D-Moves over to table. Leans over.
D-Would you guyds please hold back on the profanity. Its embarrassing
Gut at tablet alking about his loud friend.
Don’t worry about it. Hes just a little drundk. Well keep it down.
D-Two short jbs to the loudmouths fat face.
Everone at loudmouths table stands up.
Want to take it outside
D-says nothing hoping it will not go outside.
Al-guy at davids table. Come on.Lets get out of here.
Al-I have never seen anything like the balls you just showed as the loudmouths drive away and david is safe.
Deb-whay did you do that?
D-they were being rude and loud
I didn’t even hear them.
Al-your boyfriend is my hero. Everyone wants to stand up to assholes like those.
David-lets go for a drink somewhere else.
Group leaves for another bar
Uneventful rest of night.
David goes home to his apartment alone afte driving deb back to her parents.
David turns up the volume on his police scanner.
Neighbor pounds on the wall indicating to turn down radio. David feels intimidated again. Turns down police radio. Realizes he will be uncomfortable until he makes peace with the neighbor hwho knocked on th3e wall. He has never met that high rise neifghbor. David tries to knock on the neighbors door the next day to apologize. He only repeats the same behavior he has always engaged in. he just wants to relieve the anxiety he feels from being intimidated by the neighbor. He feels uncomfortable in his house. He knows he will continue to feel that way until he gets the relief of shaking hands with the neighbor or fighting him. He cannot then or now live with the internal discomfort discomfort of the threatening feeling he feels just living next door to this intimidating neighbor who he has never met.
D-knocks on neighbors door-Lady-answers door
D-im sorry about that noise the other night
Lady- oh, that was my boyfriend. He gets mean when his sleep is disrupted. That noise woke him. Don’t worry about it. I’ll tell him you came by
D-could I taeel him myself that im sorry?
Lady-No. He isn’t home. Ill tell him. It was nothing. Forget it
D-Ok as lady shuts the door.
David lying on bed afterword.
He decides he does not want to live in that apartment anymore. He cannot live with the anxiety. A few days later he tells deb that they should start looking for apts. David never turns on police radio again and keeps the tv very soft.
Same bullied feeeeling always that started with not being able to go outside and face the bullies back from the day that Lloyd told david to go outside and fight and david could not. Same theme for life.
Interior stein furniture
David goes to bathroom pissing again and again.
D-Dr. I cant stop pissing
Dr-its nothing. Just part of that infection I I am teating you for
D-But I just keep going and going
Dr.call me back if it doesn’t stop in a few days.
Pissing problem lasts for several years. David urinates an inhuman amount of times each day. It destroys his quality of life he goes to the dr over and over. Dr cannot find the cause.
D-Doc, you have done every test
Dwhat do you meanalmost
Dr-I have not done the single test that would rule out any other possibilities that are physical about your constant urination
D-whats the tet/
Dr-it’s a cystoscope where a tube is inserted in your penis so I can see everything I have not seen in all the other tests.
Dr-Just forget about it david. there is nothing wrong with you
Dr-Im getting married and I need to be right to work and to live. I cant with this continual pissing problem
Dr-you think about it
So, as david is about to geet married he desperately still seeks a way to once and for all prove his manhood thru physical courage. He also trys to find the courage to take this weel know terribly painful cystoscope test. Life is a nighmsare of anxiety.
David at stein interior-sitting and pondering
David cannot relieve the anxiety within that keeps him from having any peace of mind. He is constantly pre-occupied with the need to get into a physical confrontation that will make him feel satisified about his manlihood. He also is pissing continually thinking he has a disease dsapite repeated trips to the Dr.
The wedding is in a few months and david is in a constant state of high anxiety. He talks to no one.
David finally comes to a decision about both issues. He will seek out another guy again and pucnch him in the face just one on one. Like he has never done before.
David-walks ouit of stein onto street of downtown Chicago. He decides to bump into a tough looking character on a main downtown street and when the guy reacts angrily david will punch him in the face. David will do this among lots of people where the fight is sure to be broken up quickly.
David exterior-walking on state st
David looks oup. Coming toward him is of all l the people in the world his old time nemesis and bully dennis oloiff. David recognizes nhim even though he has not seeen him for about 10 years
D-To dennis approaching the other way.
David remembers feeling that if he did not act now then his life would be over. This was meant to be.It was a scene like in the twilight zone
Dennis starts to pass him and david garners all the courage and will he can. He lashed out and punches dennis in the mouth. Dennis goes down on the ground rom the half hearted blow. David jumps on top of him with a knww in the chest. Dennis holds his hand s in front of his face defensively trembling while awaiting the next blow.. David lets him up.
Oliff-Why did you hit me?
David-I don’t know. It was like I was in a dram and we were back in high school and you were pushing me around.
Olifff-that was over 10 yaears ago. Were you just let out of a mental institution.
Dennis-Lets just have a cup of coffee david says point;ing to a restaurant a few feet away
Dennis-Looking at david with fear but too scared to say no.
The two sit down and talk at a tble. David does not want dennis to think he needs to do something to protect himself from david. That would create another obsession
D-Dennis. This is all done. I never want to deal with you again. This was all about me
Dennis-is it out of your head now?
Dennis-Getting ip. Get some help stein. This is really abnormal.
D-you did a lot of damage
They both leave going different directions.
David-exterior-dancing down the street.
He thinks that he is now finally done proving his version of manhood and courage to himself
Interior-back at steins
D-Lloyd, you ll never believe this
There wasa a guy who shoved me aroung in high school
I just was walking down s5tate street and saw h;im.
L-I couldn’t resist the urge to get even with him. I punched him right in the mouth
L-distracted-not really caring
L-Good. Sounds like he had it coming
David at home at moters house ecstatic
David-to old best friend Mike.
D-So, Im walking down the street and I see oliff. Remember him
M-whatever happened to him
D-i don’t know but I do know what I did when I saw him.
I punched him in the face
D_Because of all the times he made shit out of me
M-What did he do
D-he went down like a sack of shit trembling and hoping I wouldn’t keep hitting him
M-what'd you do?
D-I let him up
D-i convinced him to go for a cup of coffee so I could explain myself
M-explain that youre crazy
M-i cant believe it
D-i did it
David on the phone
Dr-I want t have that cystoscoe test
D-you know I don’t recommend it. Its painful; and unnecessary.
D-but you said it’s the one conclusive test you can do that will tell you the real story about
Dr-yes. It would
D-Set it up pleas3e
Interior at hospital
Dr at davids bed before the test
D-remember-plento of antisthetic and no catheter afte the test
Dr-We always use a catheter so that afterwardthe pain will be decreased.
D-how much pain?
Dr-A lot for a few days
D-I don’t want a catheter stuck up there
Dr-suit yourself. Ill see you aftger I finish
Dr-you can still change your mind right now before we wheel you down
D-No- do it
David interior afteet test
Dr standing over his bed
David-there was nothing wrong. You are 100% ok in your kidneys and bladder.
Dr-I check back with you tomorrow.
Interior of david getting out of bed to urinate
D-sitting on toilet
Urine filled with blood comes out
D-Crying out in pain. Excruciating. Lasts for several days where david lays in hospital be d dreding each new urge to urinate.
David-Your ok im discharging you now. Is the pain when urinating over the sensitive sking one
Dr-OK Oh just one thing
Dr-I noticed something on your chest xray. Oh never mind. Im sure its nothing
Dr. Well, I noticed what im sure was a little piece of dudt on the xray film. When
David walks home from hospital to mothers house
Mom-Oh honey. Im so glad that’s over with
D-yeah. But I have another problem
D-he needs to do another chest xray to make sure about something. He said it was nothing
David walking into steins
Feeling he cannot breathe. Obsessed with his chest. Driving around worried to death about chest xray. Hyperventilates for several days.
David on phone to DR.
D-Doc-I want to get that chest xray done again.
Dr-Ok come by and see miss louis anytime
Miss louis does chest xray
Phone call for david at home
Dr-Hi david. Your chest xray id fine. There was just some dust on the old one take care.
Hyperventiallting goes away. David is fine for a day or so