Showing posts with label addiction. Show all posts
Showing posts with label addiction. Show all posts

Monday, April 12, 2021

GEORGE PERRY FLOYD JR-PART OF HIS LIFE STORY

 George Perry Floyd Jr. (October 14, 1973 – May 25, 2020) was an African American man killed during an arrest after a store clerk alleged he had passed a counterfeit $20 bill in Minneapolis. Derek Chauvin, one of four police officers who arrived on the scene, knelt on Floyd's neck and back for 9 minutes and 29 seconds.[2] After his death, protests against police brutality, especially towards Black people, quickly spread across the United States and internationally.

Floyd grew up in Houston, playing football and basketball throughout high school and college. He was a hip hop artist and served as a mentor in his religious community. Between 1997 and 2005, he was convicted of eight crimes. He served four years in prison after accepting a plea bargain for a 2007 aggravated robbery in a home invasion.[3] In 2014, he moved to the Minneapolis area, residing in the nearby suburb of St. Louis Park, and worked as a truck driver and bouncer. In 2020, he lost his job as a truck driver, and then his security job during the COVID-19 pandemic.

The City of Minneapolis settled a wrongful death lawsuit with Floyd's family for $27 million. The trial of Derek Chauvin, the police officer who knelt on Floyd's neck and back, began on March 8, 2021. The trial of the other three officers at the scene of his death is scheduled for August 2021.

Early life and education

Floyd was born on October 14, 1973, in Fayetteville, North Carolina, to George Perry and Larcenia "Cissy" Jones Floyd.[4][5] He had four siblings.[6][7][8]

When he was two, after Floyd's parents separated, his mother moved with the children to the Cuney Homes public housing,[9][10][11] known as Bricks, in Houston's Third Ward, a historically African-American neighborhood.[4][5][9] Floyd was called Perry as a child, but also Big Floyd; being over six feet (183 cm) tall in middle school, he saw sports as a vehicle for improving his life.[9]

Floyd attended Ryan Middle School,[12] and graduated from Yates High School in 1993. While at Yates, he was co-captain of the basketball team playing as a power forward. He was also on the football team as a tight end, and in 1992, his team went to the Texas state championships.[4][7][9][10]

The first of his siblings to go to college, Floyd attended South Florida Community College for two years on a football scholarship, and also played on the basketball team.[9][13][14] He transferred to Texas A&M University–Kingsville in 1995, where he also played basketball before dropping out.[15][16][17] At his tallest he was 6 feet 6 inches (198 cm)[18][19][20] though by the time of his autopsy he was 6 feet 4 inches (193 cm) tall and weighed 223 pounds (101 kg).[21]

Later life

Floyd returned to Houston from college in Kingsville, Texas, in 1995 and became an automotive customizer and played club basketball.[15][22] Beginning in 1994, he performed as a rapper using the stage name Big Floyd in the hip-hop group Screwed Up Click.[23][24][25][26] The New York Times described his deep-voiced rhymes as "purposeful", delivered in a slow-motion clip about "'choppin' blades' – driving cars with oversize rims – and his Third Ward pride."[9] The second rap group he was involved in was "Presidential Playas" and he worked on their album Block Party released in 2000.[27][28] An influential member of his community, Floyd was respected for his ability to relate with others in his environment based on a shared experience of hardships and setbacks, having served time in prison and living in a poverty-struck project in Houston.[29] In a video addressing the youth in his neighborhood, Floyd reminds his audience that he has his own "shortcomings" and "flaws" and that he isn't better than anyone else, but also expresses his disdain for the violence that was taking place in the community, and advises his neighbors to put down their weapons and remember that they are loved by him and God.[29]

Between 1997 and 2005, Floyd served eight jail terms on various minor charges, including drug possession, theft, and trespass.[3][9][7][note 1] In 2007, Floyd faced charges for aggravated robbery with a deadly weapon; according to investigators, he had entered an apartment by impersonating a water department worker and barging in with five other men, then held a pistol to a woman's stomach and searched for items to steal.[11][30][31] Floyd was arrested three months later during a traffic stop and victims of the robbery identified him from a photo array.[31] In 2009, he was sentenced to five years in prison as part of a plea deal[30][32][33] and was paroled in January 2013.[15] After Floyd's release, he became more involved with Resurrection Houston, a Christian church and ministry, where he mentored young men and posted anti-violence videos to social media.[4][9][34][35] He delivered meals to senior citizens and volunteered with other projects, such as the Angel By Nature Foundation, a charity founded by rapper Trae tha Truth.[36] Later he became involved with a ministry that brought men from the Third Ward to Minnesota in a church-work program with drug rehabilitation and job placement services.[9] A friend of Floyd acknowledged that Floyd "had made some mistakes that cost him some years of his life," but that he had been turning his life around through religion.[29]

In 2014, Floyd moved to Minneapolis to help rebuild his life and find work.[37][38] Soon after his arrival, he completed a 90-day rehabilitation program at the Turning Point program in north Minneapolis. Floyd expressed the need for a job and took up security work at Harbor Light Center, a Salvation Army homeless shelter.[31] He lost the job at Harbor Light and took up several other jobs. Floyd hoped to earn a commercial driver's license to operate trucks. He passed the required drug test and administrators of the program felt his criminal past did not pose a problem, but he dropped out as his job at a nightclub made it difficult to attend morning classes, and he felt pressure to earn money. Floyd later moved to St. Louis Park and lived with former colleagues.[31] Floyd continued to battle drug addiction and went through periods of use and sobriety.[31]

In May 2019, Floyd was detained by Minneapolis police when an unlicensed car he was a passenger in was pulled over in a traffic stop. Floyd was found with a bottle of pain pills. Officers handcuffed Floyd and took him to the city's third police precinct station. Floyd told police he did not sell the pills and that they were related to his own addiction. When Floyd appeared agitated, officers encouraged him to relax and helped calm him down, and they later called an ambulance as they grew worried about his condition. No charges were filed in connection with the incident.[31]

In 2019, George Floyd worked security at the El Nuevo Rodeo club, where police officer Derek Chauvin also worked off-duty as a security guard.[39]

In 2020, Floyd was working part time as a security guard at the Conga Latin Bistro club, and began another job as a delivery driver. Floyd lost the delivery driver job in January after being cited for driving without a valid commercial license and for being involved in a minor crash. He was looking for another job when the COVID-pandemic hit Minnesota, and his personal financial situation worsened when the club closed in mid March due to pandemic rules.[31] In April of that year, Floyd contracted COVID-19 himself, but recovered a few weeks later.[9][6]

Death

On May 25, 2020, Floyd was arrested after allegedly passing a counterfeit $20 bill at a grocery store in the Powderhorn Park neighborhood of Minneapolis.[40] He died after Derek Chauvin, a White police officer, pressed his knee to Floyd's neck for 9 minutes and 29 seconds[note 2] during the arrest.[41] Floyd was handcuffed face down in the street,[42][43][44] while two other officers further restrained Floyd and a fourth prevented onlookers from intervening.[45]:6:24[46][47] Floyd's restraint and death were captured on a cellphone camera and sparked global protests.[48] Seventeen minutes into the arrest, Floyd was unconscious.[49] Repeatedly while pinned under Chauvin's knee, he stated that he couldn't breathe.[50] During the final two minutes,[51] Floyd was motionless and had no pulse.[52][53] Onlookers repeatedly called out for help upon realization of Floyd's struggling.[49] Though the officers called for medical assistance, they took no action to treat him.[54]:6:46 Chauvin kept his knee on Floyd's neck and back as emergency medical technicians arrived.[54]:7:21 The incident was captured on video.[55]

The medical examiner's final findings,[56][57] issued June 1,[58] found that Floyd's heart stopped while he was being restrained and that his death was a homicide[56] caused by "cardiopulmonary arrest complicating law enforcement subdual, restraint, and neck compression".[59][58] Fentanyl intoxication and recent methamphetamine use may have increased the likelihood of death.[60][58] Other significant conditions were arteriosclerotic heart disease and hypertensive heart disease.[61][56] The report states that on April 3 Floyd had tested positive for SARS-CoV-2, the virus that causes COVID-19, but does not list it as a fatal or other significant condition.[62][63]

Floyd's family commissioned a second autopsy, carried out by Michael Baden, a pathologist and former New York City chief medical examiner who had previously autopsied Eric Garner, and attended by Allecia Wilson, director of autopsy and forensic services at the University of Michigan Medical School.[64][65] From the evidence available to them, which did not include a toxicology report or unspecified bodily samples, Baden and Wilson announced on June 1 their finding that Floyd's death was a homicide caused by asphyxia due to neck and back compression.[66][64][61] Also, Floyd had no underlying medical problem that contributed to his death.[67] Baden said neck compression affected blood flow to the brain[61] and being able to speak does not mean that someone is able to breathe.[67]

On March 12, 2021, the Minneapolis city council approved a settlement of $27 million to the Floyd family following a wrongful death lawsuit.[68]

According to The New York Times, actions taken by the officers during the arrest directly violated Minneapolis Police Department policies.[69] After Floyd's death, Derek Chauvin was fired and charged with second-degree murder.[70] The charge was altered to second-degree murder after Chauvin was initially charged with third-degree murder, as the second-degree charge essentially claims that Floyd's death was "without intent" on Chauvin's part.[13] According to the Associated Press, the decisive points for the trial will be the questions of whether Chauvin caused George Floyd's death and if what Chauvin did in the situation could be considered reasonable.[71] Much of the trial's attention is being focused on how exactly Floyd died. Chauvin is being represented by attorney Eric Nelson, who is claiming the likely cause of death is a fentanyl overdose or a possible combination of fentanyl, methamphetamine, and underlying conditions.[72] For this reason, according to the Associated Press, legal experts say the case will not be a simple one.[72] One such expert made the statement that, "Although he had him pinned under his knee and he's yelling 'I can't breathe! I can't breathe!' there's an argument that (Chauvin) wasn't exerting pressure and his inability to breathe was due to the drugs in his system or something to that effect, or his anxiety".[72] Chauvin has denied the charges of murder and manslaughter, which carry sentences of up to 40 years in prison.[55]


Tuesday, April 6, 2021

COACH DAVE MAY BE THE PERSON TO TALK WITH

I am someone who understands inner torment and can connect to many people who suffer from depression, anxiety, and addictions. 

The right person and the right words can be critical to finding relief. 

I am a retired, single male of 72. I  understand people like me and may be able to help you. 

I am a lifelong sufferer of addiction including, ocd, impulse disorder, adhd,  compulsive gambling, sex and love junkie. 

I have tried it all and found talk therapy works best.

Contact me.

Coach Dave

Free 1 hour consultation

Monday, August 31, 2020

OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE DISORDER (OCD) STILL TORTURED AFTER 72 YEARS

How about some real time (OCD) obsessive compulsive disorder talk? I have been tormented and tortured by it almost my entire 72 male years. I have pure OCD as it is known. 

I do not need to keep checking the door to see of it is locked or checking the stove to see if it is turned off, or wash my hands a million times a day.

My misery is different. I must confront people who I think have insulted me. Fear is my constant companion because my whole deal is connected to confrontation. Doing fearful things so I can get the fearful thing off my mind are my boulders to carry.. 

So, if someone tells me to go fuck myself, or they say they think I stink at golf or if I feel that I must defend someone's honor who is a friend or loved one who has been insulted or abused, or the music next door is too loud or someone slams a door too hard or tons of other things happen than I become incapacitated. 

I sit and ruminate about what I can do to resolve the problem. I cannot function while my mind is pre-occupied with a thought of some act that I must perform that involves danger or personal harm to eliminate a problem..

My right eye was destroyed permanently by unnecessarily getting into a fight with some guy who was smacking around his girlfriend in the hallway of my apartment. The guy was hardly doing anything to this girl but he scared me just by looking at me so I did the only thing I knew to eliminate the fear I knew I would feel whenever I saw him. I hit him and he demolished me.

I tried to stop him verbally and when he swore at me instead of just walking back into my apartment I took a lame swing at him. He turned out to be a boxer who had just gotten released from jail for attempted murder. 

He busted me up and then my girl friend at the time took care of me for a few weeks and then threw me out for being so ignorant. She knew it was my OCD and not a sincere attempt to be a do gooder. 

That is just one story among many and I do not feel like writing much more tonight. 

I am in such an OCD state of mind for several months and I have such a litany of things on my mind that I cannot even phantom trying to resolve one OCD thought at a time. Because, I know that in attempting to resolve an irrational problem I may very well perpetuate it. 

I could spend twenty years trying to find a guy who insulted me a few months ago telling me to go fuck myself. 

Plus, I do not really want to find him because it's not about what he said that is the object of my OCD. It is about me letting go or just living with this OCD trigger.  

I just cannot deal with my OCD only through therapy, medicine, psychotherapy, meditation, or working out. 

Only by writing about it can I get relief. Writing works for me. It eases and temporarily eliminates OCD urges. And that is what an OCD sufferer wants. 

Relief.

I have been all tense because about 16 months ago I was playing softball and after the game, at lunch, I happened to make a remark about a political subject to two guys. 

I am liberal and one of the guys who is in charge of this men's basketball league is a Trump Republican. The other guy there is just the first guys puppet.

I mentioned something about Medicare that both tight asses took exception to. The main guy barked at me that there was no political talk allowed and he walked away from me at the restaurant. The puppet followed with a parting insult. 

I thought nothing of it until a few weeks later when I am at this restaurant again and see this same guy who decides to maliciously goad the other 10 or so guys at the table to not talk to me so I won't come back to lunch with them again. 

I walked over to both assholes to try to shake hands but both refused to. Well, that was 16 months ago and I have spent hundreds and maybe thousands of hours trying to figure out how I could make peace with both of those guys without escalating the situation and making it worse. 

Because once I start trying to resolve a perceived problem my OCD kicks in like crazy and I could be arrested for harassment or trespassing quickly by doing crazy things to get satisfaction. 

So this situation has meant sitting and ruminating everyday for ways I can make peace with both assholes without making it worse by confronting one or both of them and they still will not make peace and then I get physical. 

And, I am not tough and intimidating at all. It all has to do with how I was bullied and try to not get bullied anymore. All that is for another time so write in.

So, I have learned some very critical things about my OCD. If I do not do anything to try and make things right with these guys I will not end up making things worse and going into an OCD hell that I have lived through forever by trying to force them to resolve the issue.

I have learned that it is 100% better to just leave a situation alone rather than try to force it to bend to my will. 

That is a big understanding when the urge to try and work it out is so intense. But, I am safe by doing nothing and I do not have to act out . I just have tp live with the ocd urge and fix things from within like I am doing right now. 

 I know that I have OCD and there will always be more issues and more issues that torture me. But, I can only make things worse, as I have learned by acting out instead of sitting on my hands and being safe.  

Once upon a time I would be chasing these guys all over, even hiring private detectives so I could find them and try to get them to just shake hands.

So, I am writing about this because the answers do not lie with either of them. 

The answers lie in my tormented mind.

There is hope. But, OCD is ferocious.

I have improved.  

Saturday, February 1, 2020

OCD AND ME-A 71 YEAR JOURNEY WITH OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE DISORDER

I'm a 71 year old male and I have suffered from (obsessive compulsive disorder) (ocd) since I was about 8 years old. 

A terrifying image of myself standing over my bed, dead tired, and continually jumping in and out of it but not being able to rest comes to mind.  

I was tormented then because my pillow was not precisely centered along a thin line that ran vertically from the top to the bottom of the headboard. It was driving me crazy trying trying to center it perfectly. 

I believed bad things would happen if I did not get it perfectly aligned. Fear and superstition were then and are still now the root of all obsessive compulsive disorders. 

 My tired little body was no match for my twisted mind which kept commanding me to get up again and again and line the pillow up better.  

Sweat streamed down my face and soaked my pajamas as I continued to jump in and out of bed trying to get that uncooperative pillow aligned to the satisfaction of my obsessive compulsive demons.

Finally, I passed out from the fatigue of being a frustrated, worn out little kid. That was not a temporary problem I would grow out of. It is now 71 years later and my ocd still rages on. 

There have been countless episodes of these same kinds of torturous experiences throughout my entire life. 

My symptoms changed from physical compulsions like washing hands, re-checking lights, not stepping on cracks, and many of the common ocd symptoms most people are familiar with to all mental ocd symptoms.    

The award winning movie " As Good As It Gets", starring Jack Nicholson captures ocd in a humorous, but sadly accurate way.  

My mental or pure ocd which started in my twenties became increasingly intense,  with relentless mental, repetitive, fearful thoughts and questions with no answers and no relief attainable ruminating through my brain. 

My thinking centered around facing irrational fears. Taking physically dangerous, risky actions was the bitter medicine I prescribed myself to get temporary relief.

My approach was metaphorically akin to jumping into a cage with a deadly lion just to get rid of the fear of doing it. 

I would relieve fear by crashing into it head first. It was              misdirected thinking that demonstrating insanity permanently cured ocd symptoms.  

My archaic, false definition of manhood was central to my distorted thinking. I believed that being macho proved manhood.

 Many times it would take months and years to actually follow through on certain dangerous actions or missions I assigned myself with no lasting relief.   

But, I could not get fearful thoughts out of my mind so into that lions cage I would eventually jump ravaging my psyche for any path to get peace of mind.

Many times I would make a bad situation much worse and I would have to start the whole mentally torturous process over again after performing some crazy action that failed. 

Or, if I did succeed in eliminating an obsession than quickly another obsession of equal or greater torment would emerge. 
 Seeking danger, and finding the courage to face it was all I used to understand to ease my anguish. I walked around terrified because I am no warrior.

My world was my lopsided brain swirling around like a gyroscope spinning the same painful thoughts constantly. They all centered around facing unnecessary fear. 
What if, what if, and more what ifs became my internal language as I anticipated taking crazy actions with scary consequences. 

I only wanted relief. That was my only motive for jumping in the cages of many dangerous lions. 

I felt only gratitude if I had not been hurt, killed, thrown in jail, or put in an insane asylum after I survived an insane action I took. 
I have lived a life of flight or fight everyday for 63 years.

The central theme of my particular ocd symptoms has been proving I am not a coward and could not be bullied. The reality is that no amount of insane acts of facing danger or standing up for myself has eliminated that cowardly little boy inside of me or has given me inner peace. 


Confrontation is my tool that always takes charge of my thinking. I chased a guy around for twenty years who bullied me when I was 12 years old at the local park. I met him at a train station 25 years after we had last seen each other. I provoked a fight with him and I got the worst of it. 

He stood over me as I went down and he told me I was lucky he was not going to kick my head in.
He left yelling that I was immature and I had not grown up as I crawled on all fours watching him walk away.  

I could not live with just letting that episode go even though I did not have one drop of violence in me toward him or anyone. My crusades were only about finding relief through some distorted definition I had of what manhood and courage was.   

I decided I wanted a rematch with this guy and it took several anxiety, fear ridden years to even find him again. I knew nothing of his life since we were kids.  

Then, after a very long and totally crazy search I ran into him again by accident and we had another encounter I provoked where I ended up on top of him. An intense severe desire to apologize to him developed after it ended. I wanted him to know i was not dangerous. 
I needed his understanding and forgiveness.  

  This strange saga went on ad nauseum  until I finally found his phone number.  To my amazement, when I gathered the courage to call him, he allowed me to apologize.  Even that was not enough for me to let the obsession with him go. 
Think of that? 

 I then wanted to talk to him in person to confirm that we were good.. He finally ended up taking me to court to stop my renewed pursuit. Even that did not stop me because I still felt I had not explained myself satisfactorily. 
Just like the pillow.
I could not get it right. 

I was told by the lawyers and the judge that it was a condition of my probation that I never contact him or get near him again or I would go to jail.  

While on probation and against all orders and sensibility I again contacted him via a letter trying to explain my ocd condition. I felt I was compelled to write to release my mind from the inhumane prison I had not been released from. 
I was willing to risk my freedom for one more chance to get relief. 

  I sent the letter. He did not turn me in and that ended that horrid saga. It was a miracle he did not go right to the lawyers and judge.
I got away with that one but I did not get away with the next one. 

 I ended up fighting with some guy who was in an altercation with his girlfriend. 

I only started that fight because the guy scared me for months without ever saying a word to me. He had me bullied with his looks. He ended up almost permanently blinding me from the right hand he slammed into my eyeball.  

 I had told him to stop hassling his girlfriend one night in the hallway floor of the high rise where we were neighbors. It was nothing and none of my business.  He said fuck you. Get away from me. I  started to go back into my apartment  but he started yelling at his girlfriend again. I screamed at him to leave her alone. 

He  came back at me wild eyed and it was lights out. The result was a blinded eye, broken eardrum, rattled brain and the emergency room. For nothing. I only fought with him to prove the same manhood shit. 

My girlfriend at the time nursed me back to health and then she dumped me for being a crazy fool. She was right. She knew I did it out of ocd and not nobility.

Example of my condition. A person is playing loud music next door to me. I break out into palpitating anxiety as I listen maybe for several days for more music. I knock on the door and politely ask that the music be turned down.

If the person apologizes and does not act with hostility or in a threatening manner then I never care again about any noise coming from that apartment. 

Same for other issues involving me feeling victimized by disturbances like barking dogs, loud noises or other situations where I felt like a victim. 

If the answer from the person is angry or was a get out of my face answer my life would immediately be ruined. My mind would not let me stop thinking about that apartment. 

I would start trying to find a way to make peace with that person and if I could not I would rationalize that I wanted to find a new apartment.

That is a taste of how a big part of my life has been. In reality I'm just a nice Jewish boy whose brain was really derailed by genetic flaws. 

However, I am blessed to be healthy, free, and having a great life despite my insanity. I am much better now after lots of hard work on my head.

 I used to believe I had to say and do fearful, terrifying, dangerous acts or something bad would happen. 

Now, I cope with my ocd demons with words and actions that are restricted to my own, safe, trustworthy and lasting coping mechanisms. I no longer have to be afraid of what I will do with ocd urges. I will do nothing outside of  the confines my mind. All work is done in my internal premises. 

Knowing that acting out is futile and destructive 100% of the time is my new reality. It took many long years and much suffering to accept myself with the flaws in my personality. But, the payoff in peace of mind and tranquility is well worth it.

 I admit, Staying in control is brutally hard. Emotions are so strong with any addiction. Now, there is no more self imposed, legal, medical, or personal trouble. I fear no consequences of aberrant behavior. I do not do it. 

I realized that permanent solutions come from within. I am rewarded daily for not acting out because there are so many triggers tempting all of us addicts.  

I've gotten better by changing how I think, live, interact, and relate. I am in recovery and have been for a long time. I know about recovery from being in Gamblers Anonymous (GA) for over 11 years without placing a bet. 

All addictions are very similar. They are all nothing but abnormal urges. It is just about how they are coped with. Tough stuff to accept but accepting powerlessness is the only answer no matter what you are addicted to. Throw up that white flag.

I am powerless and I always will be over my addictions so I do not act on them.

I never realized, as I do now, that I had an incurable disease. I could never surrender and say "David, you cannot cure this condition by any external measures. The solution lies only within. 

I have learned how to talk to become friends with myself. It works.

 Medicine,  meditation, therapy, support groups, working out, writing and talking to others does wonders for ocd sufferers and for other addictive disorders. Just stop wasting that good mind. 

Ocd comes in so many forms. It is a supremely complex condition that only a very small percentage of people are afflicted with to a serious degree. Everyone understands ocd to some degree but are  far from being incapacitated from it. Then there is us.   

 Fortunately, the mind is a resilient structure. Change the focus and the picture becomes different quickly. That is not an easy assignment as many of you know.      

 My ocd and all ocd boils down to a fear of living with anxiety and fear. Sounds simple and logical but it is not.
The triggers are so emotional and irrational that it is very hard to think logically when that dog barks or that person insults me.    

It's not me it's my ocd is an easy concept to understand intellectually but a brutally hard concept to apply emotionally.

But, it can be done and provides real relief if one can accept it.   

 So, it is real progress when that ocd urge takes second position to the comfort of knowing that you do not have to do anything externally to cope with it. 

One just has to realize what is happening with our addictions whatever they are. 

That is relief. No more jumping into the cage with the lion.
OCD cannot be cured so why try.  Addictions cannot be cured. Only arrested. That is as good as it gets and that is good enough.
My fight is over. 
End your fight.

Surrender and get help.
Now.  
It's the only answer.
Go to Google.

  

Saturday, January 11, 2020

TRUMP IS A HUMAN HUNK OF POLITICAL CRACK COCAINE

I am so sick of Donald J. Trump, President of the United States, monopolizing my life. But, I cannot stop thinking about him. I admit it. He is a drug and an addiction to me.

I am addicted to watching, listening, talking, tweeting and reading about Trump on CNN, MSNBC  FOX news, Twitter, Facebook, and almost any media where I see his name. 

Wherever I can get a snort of Trump I dive in. I devour his scummy life packed with sensationalized news each day. While despising every disgusting, stupid, vile, reprehensible thing Trump is saying or doing I cannot get enough of this wreck of a human being. 

Just like any junkie I start getting withdrawal symptoms when I am deprived of getting Trump news.  For me, a minute away from Trumps activities is an eternity if something is going on with this evil, low life, gutter rat.    

Eventually, Trump will not be President. The feeling of not getting Trump fixes will be like being cut off from any narcotic. It will be painful. I will badly miss the action he brings to my junkie mind. Trump is an addictive drug, not a person. 

He is a drug of the worst kind because he destroys lives all over the world. I think many people feel like me but do not admit it.

When he is gone I will suffer intense withdrawal symptoms just as I have in the past when giving up gambling, cigarettes, sex, cocaine, and overeating.  

I continually criticize, abuse, vilify and try to vanquish Trump with words but I would have to quickly replace him with someone or something else if he were out of office. I need Trump rushes. 

He is like a cell phone, computer, microwave oven or any other gadget you never knew about and than quickly realized you could not fully live without.

No matter how many reporters, commentators, pundits, and other people who cover Trump express contempt, hatred, anger, criticism, love or support for Trump they happily take the money he earns them. 

Giant paydays are happening made for many thousands of people like me who exploit this lying sick, deranged, overblown hunk of political crack. 

Think of cable celebrities like Anderson Cooper, Rachel Maddow, Brett Baer, Chuck Todd, Chris Wallace, Sean Hannity, Geraldo Riviera, Tucker Carlson, Erin Burnett, Katy Tur  and on and on whose lives are dedicated to reporting and talking about Donald Trump to their hundreds of millions of followers.  

They pull in billions of dollars of consumers cash each day from viewers who buy their stations advertised products and services. 

Maddow, a huge liberal and ultra conservative Hannity alone, an ultra conservative flame thrower, get viewed by fifty to a hundred million people each day. And those are just two cable reporters or entertainers.

Think of all the businesses who suck in big revenues from buyers who spend their cash because Trump is the draw for their advertising.    

There are over 330 million people in this country. I think Trump generates enough dough to qualify as a one man global promotions industry. 

Can you imagine the billions and billions of dollars being paid to people working jobs in the media covering Trumps movements? 

I hate Trump but I do not deny that he has probably made more people more money than any other politician on earth. 

That is a huge statement but it sounds right does it not? He has been a media sensation politically for several years now. He just keeps getting bigger.

If he stopped making sensationalized, scandalous, slimy, irresistible news every outlet would throw him away like a bag of dog poop. He knows that. So he keeps supplying us with more junk.

He desperately needs the attention he gets. It is chicken soup for his twisted brain. He is a total junkie like some of us. Look at him in front of friendly crowds. He is in bliss. 

He is money, money, money. money. Think of the joy the media advertisers feel as they rake in giant cash from the products and services Trump sells for them. 

He is worth an unbelievable fortune to many employers and employees connected to him in some way.

Consider the legions of people who deplore and vilify Trump 24/7 yet fill their bank accounts because of his pathetic, destructive Presidency?  

The height of hypocrisy prevails among so many of us. His sick, mindless, cowardly Republican senate supporters  enable him to avoid getting busted to keep their jobs. Yet, they all know they are part of Trumps con game.

Give me some numbers please cable advertisers or economists.  Send me some information on how Trump is affecting the GNP because of his decadent presidency?

I'll send you a free gift. A quid pro quo.

People who earn their living because of Trumps devilish presidency are the biggest hypocrites on earth. The lash him with their tongues and pens and deposit the money he brings them. Like me in this article.  

Trump, you are a drug. You are nothing but a big hit of some evil dope. 

Resign. Leave. Go away. You are ruining the country and also many parts of the world. Many of us would be happy to see you get impeached and sent to rot in jail. 
Or, in a mental institution where you belong.